Something about Christmas changed! Maybe it was all ways this way,but I guess I never experienced it the way I did this year.
The magic was gone - Our family is not the same anymore. You could say half of them lost their dreams and the other half never had any! Everything was...well...empty. The jokes, the conversations, even the food tasted funny.
What happened to Christmas? I know it is not Christ's real birthday and all that. But still, It all ways was a time to get together as a family or bunch of friends and just to be happy,merry or just silly.
Is it just me or did we lost something. a Thing in our souls that make us more human has been lost. Something is slipping away. I am fore ever searching for meaning or reality in every situation - maybe I overdone it this year.
In my soul there is a longing for the Kingdom of God. Something real and alive. Christianity as a religion is fading away or become less relevant to the questions and needs of modern society - The amazing part of all is that the answers we are searching for are there in the truth of this "religion", but you must come close in denying the faith before you can see the truth.
But we as Christians will for the next hundred generations keep the fakeness off Christmas alive with turkey's and presents with expensive holidays and fake smiles. HO,HO HO!!!
I wonder if somebody will ever read this stuff.
Maybe someday.

The thinking thing

I do that a lot these days - "the thinking thing". I am watching people at a streetcrossing. People don't seem to be awake. Watch that guy! He did not even notice the girl on the bike. His eyes are focused on something only he himself can see. The taxidriver skipped the red light, somebody on the other side was waving at him. I don't know. It seems to me we are living in a world filled with zombies, maybe I am one myself. Just walking the same paths and talking the same things day after day after day.

What will happen to the man that one day wakes up out of this deathlike life. I want to find out! I am going to wake up and take a stroll through this land of shadows. I just wish there was somebody to hold on to. Somebody to hold my hand.